2012!

if it didn’t bring you joy, just leave it behind. let’s ring in the new year with good things in mind. lose every bad memory that brought heartache and pain. let’s turn a new leaf, with the smell of new rain. let’s forget past mistakes, making amends for last year. sending you these greetings, to help you bring in the new year!

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012! ♥ be safe!

frozen moments of time.

since i really don’t use this website for blogging, and i really don’t need it.. i am going to use this as my photography website. or portfolio. it’s especially useful because it is my name! they wouldn’t have to think twice about who i was. haha.. no but really.. no more blogs for me. i think it’s better that all my thoughts stay in my head anyway. although i cannot say when i’ll be done, i am going to start working on the new website today. wish me luck! <3

Yet another day,

*yawn* flies by before my eyes!

going to be hospitalized at Seattle’s Harbor View Hospital on the 5th. they said it could take from 6 to 10 days. it’s gonna suck, i just hope they can keep me out of pain during my visit, or else i will be forced to leave! it’s the first, well second now.. . i didn’t get my money!? i wonder what’s going on.. . i hope i didn’t get cut off or else my hospital bill isn’t gonna be covered. i don’t think they will even take me! i always get it on the first, i wonder what’s up. hope everything is okay.

i got a bunch of new hello kitty stickers, socks, and little gizmos. they are so adorable. i’m such a sucker for sanrios! i wish i kept the clay sculpture i made at school of badtz maru. he was the coolest ever. only about a half a foot tall but he still rocked.

i soo need to find my camera’s charger, or just but a new one. i miss taking pictures. *sigh* lost it shortly after marty wrecked his car. well my car now! i think he accidently mixed it up with his cords while he was taking all the stuff out of the car. hrmpf! but i can’t find it anywhere! at least i know i will be able to charge it when i go over to Seattle. my bro has the same charger! so at least i won’t miss out on my infamous seattle pictures. i’m hoping mike will lend me his vapor cigarette thing so i can smoke in the hospital. i sooo need something cause i won’t be able to even leave my room during the testing and.. bleh. it says i can request patches but i really don’t care for them much.

anyway, i hope they find something- or rather not. but i just want an answer. i want to get on with my life without anything in my way. i’m so tired of it. wish me luck!

Oh man..

Going to the doctors soon! I have to leave around 8am.. Sucks =/ at least I slept last night though. *Yawn* I’m planning on having like a billion tests done to me this afternoon.. Oh JOY! <.< *falls over* Wish me luck! Bali's Best = one of the best coffee candies ever! You HAVE to try them if you like coffee!! So good. *melts*

mind slave.

i feel like a robot. putting on a face, just so no one will worry about me. i try to be happy, it’s slipping. suicide pours into my head and i can’t help it. i’m scared to drive a car by myself because everytime i do i imagine myself flooring it and going head on into a car, or a little off the road into a telephone pole. sometimes i even think about jumping out the door seeing my face grind against the pavement. i don’t want to live anymore. someone save me from myself.